BREAKING NEWS: Alex Jones KIDNAPPED By Satanic Silicone Valley

After the news broke that the satanists at Silicone Valley were engaging in an Info-War against conspiracy legend Alex Jones, it has emerged right now that Google has captured Alex Jones and are holding him hostage somewhere in Google HQ, deep underwater.

Early August, InfoWars was banned from Facebook, Apple, YouTube, and Spotify in an obvious collusion as these companies are controlled by interdimensional psychic vampires and could not let the TRUTH be known. Twitter was the last company to fold, just last week deciding to ban Alex from the platform forever because he hit Jack Dorsey (Twitter CEO) with too many truthbombs at a congressional hearing. With all contact to the outside world cut off, Alex was quickly intercepted and taken by Google, who are now trying to erase any evidence of Alex’s existence by hacking into the collective human unconscious hive-mind known as Google Search and remove him from the system.

Here is the proof:

infowars evidence.png

As you can see in the screenshot above, searching for InfoWars.com into the news tab elicits no articles to the main site. This is because Big Tech have already started the Great Erasure.

Many would accuse us at InfoBomb of propagating fake news, and point to the fact that Alex Jones was seen livestreaming only a few days ago. But fact it is not; if you look at the following screenshot carefully you will see that Alex is supposedly wearing a donkey mask. This, however, is actually a coded message to the public, mocking them for believing everything they see on the internet like asses. Because Alex Jones is not the one underneath the mask. It is an imposter, pumped up on steroids and Super Male Vitality to produce an almost indistinguishable character from the original.

alexjones.jpg

Though the hoax has everyone fooled, we saw the truth for what it was immediately; as no human is capable of radiating as much pure masculinity as Alex Jones.

But why target Alex Jones? Is it what he knows? Is it what he is? Is it his ability to sell chocolate chicken bone broth by the thousands? Are they harnessing his raw energy to use as a Weapon of Mass Destruction to bring about World War Three and the New World Order? One thing is for sure, by the time they start the mass deletion program to wipe him from our memories, nuclear winter will be upon us, and we will never know.

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New Leak Finds That Barack Obama Never Existed

 

America was divided when Barack Hussein Obama II became the 44th President of the United States in January 2009. Many did not believe that he was born a citizen of the United States, claiming that he was instead born in Norway, and a ‘birthing’ movement was created. A big advocate of ‘the birthers’ was none other than the current President of America Donald ‘The Donald Trump’ Trump, who demanded that Barack Obama showcase his birth certificate to prove the haters wrong. Yet Obama never did acquiesce. Because the birth certificate didn’t exist.

Because Barack Obama had never been born.

Barack Obama never existed.

For 8 years, the American people were hoodwinked into believing that a man named Barack Obama led them. For 8 years he was watched on TV by millions. But the man on the TV was not a man at all. He was CGI, or Computer Generated Imagery, this entire time.

A credible source, who must remain anonymous, told us at InfoBomb that:

“There’s a reason you don’t see Obama much these days. It cost a fortune to keep the charade up, paid for unknowingly by the American taxpayer. Think of every single photo and video there is of Obama and realize that each of those were doctored. We had thousands of employees working around the clock during Obama’s (or as we called him ‘Obama.gif’) presidency just to make sure the secret never came out.”

Our source also exclusively gave us a set of pictures to publish, showcasing the evolution of the CGI-Obama quality.

BARAKGOL

“As you can see, our best technology was rather primitive at the time, but back in 2009 the internet wasn’t really a thing so we could get away with a lot of mistakes. If you were to squint near Obama.gif you would have been able to see his quite obvious pixels. We worked around this by making sure all important meetings were held during a game of golf, as wearing sunglasses helped cover this up nicely.”

baragolf

“Our technology improved massively since then, but we had one hiccup during Trump’s inauguration when the visual effects team couldn’t be bothered to put as much effort in the job anymore, as you can see in the photo below. Luckily no one noticed as no one was watching at the time.”

baracksee

Now that you, the reader, are educated on the menace of CGI Deep State agents, be aware of any C.G.P’s (Computer Generated Persons) in your area. A good rule of thumb is to see if they freeze without breathing for an inordinately long time (anything longer than 15 minutes is suspicious) if you turn the WiFi off.*

 

*It should be noted that MP Ed Miliband is NOT a C.G.P; we have a court order that proves it.

Proof that Donald Trump is a virgin

Proof that Trump is a virgin.

All good things must come to a beginning, and here at Infobomb we’re dedicated to sharing the truth behind seemingly normal everyday situations.

For the sake of clarity, I would like to explain, when I say “virgin”, I mean this not as an insult but merely a description of somebody whose life happens to be devoid of sexual activity.

The subject of my examination? Trump, POTUS, Drumpf, The Cheeto (my personal favourite nickname for the 74th president of the United States).
Many readers will refute my claim on the basis of Trump having multiple offspring, but I would like to present some evidence supporting the theory that they are in fact adopted, and not the natural fruit of his own workings.

Firstly, see the image below.

President Trump And First Lady Melania Hold National Thanksgiving Turkey Pardoning Ceremony

Many large differences can be seen between Donald and Barron, the most prominent of which being the glaring age disparity.
With Donald clocking in at 72 years old and Barron at a mere 12, the two could not be less alike.

Secondly, the facial expressions tell a story better than any of us here at Infobomb could.
On the left we see Barron, introspectively glaring, most likely thinking about trademarked gaming franchises (Minecraft, Guitar Hero, Dota 2) of which he’s known to be a fan.
He’s clearly very uncomfortable to be stood in front of the nation, and would much rather be at home mining for rare gems or building a to-scale model of his local Tesco.

Donald, on the other hand (the images proverbial right hand), can be seen announcing his thoughts to the world with an almost president-like confidence.
With one hand raised and another lowered, this man is no stranger to testosterone-fuelled battles of wit and saying what is on his mind, no matter the subject.

If the two were truly related, these traits would have passed down genetically and Barron – the only child of Donald – would be taller, closer to his father’s age, and would spend much less time on the gaming PC he recently built.

 

It’s also no secret that Donald is married to a wife, although there is no evidence available to the public that the two have ever laid down upon each other. In fact there is significantly more evidence to the contrary.
The most prominent piece of evidence is that Melania Trump (First Lady to ever work in the White House, according to wikipedia) is simply out of Donald’s league.

Donald-Trump-and-Melania-TrumpThe image above demonstrates this perfectly; the POTUS’ awkward smile next to his supposed girlfriend proves that Donald is not comfortable around any woman, let alone one as confident as Melania.
If Trump is unable to even stand near the woman without breaking down emotionally, it’s impossible for the two to have done the disgusting deed which often results in offspring.

This claim has also been backed up by an uncle of one of the Infobomb staff, who works a job in the White House, a mere janitor by day but when the clock strikes midnight he operates as the main strategist for the US army.
Using techniques learnt from RTS games since his childhood, the man we will refer to as ‘Uncle X’ puts together impeccable plans, the likes of which led to the takedown of Bin Laden just a few years ago.

Uncle X also knows a way to get new movies on DVD before they’re released, although the picture quality is imperfect.